When You Feel Something You Haven't
by Royal Amphitrite
Summary: A look into the relationship of Boruto and Shikadai and, for once, how Shikadai feels.


Shikadai had never experienced the feeling of _jealousy_ , before. He was a chill dude, with a slight god-like complex but it was different form being egotistic, it was just facts nobody liked.

Either way, Shikadai was a person who accepted his wins and his losses and embraced his virtues along with his flaws.

So, of course, the feeling of jealousy was new to him.

Now, what was he jealous of exactly? Well, it's an answer even his finest calculations wouldn't be able to crack.

Mitsuki.

No, he wasn't jealous of the boy's impressive skills or his not so bad looking features- or the fact he was the product of one of the _Sannin,_ or even his level headedness and easy detachment to personal situations-no. He wasn't jealous of any of that.

He was jealous of the attention.

The attention from Boruto.

Now before people jump to conclusions; he's not homosexual.

Nothing wrong with it, of course.

It's only that he and Boruto had been friends for the _longest_.

Long talks, bro hugs, and false aggression are all the recipe for a long-lasting relationship.

But here goes Boruto, prancing around, claiming Mitsuki as his best pal even though they had only been on the same team for _4_ _months_.

And Shikadai, to put it plainly, was offended.

Because after years of being friends, of being the ' _bestest of buddies_ ', he felt Boruto had replaced him so easily.

And for him, it felt unfair.

Friends with the guy since they were born, spent years with each other, learning and growing. Shikadai has always been there, where has Mitsuki been? Where was he when Boruto lost his dad to a job, when he became a ninja; when he did anything that was ever important in his life?

Now, currently, Mitsuki is missing. Shikadai (Inojin and Choko included) must track down Team 7, put an end to this madness and take Boruto and his team back home to Konoha.

But then he's at a crossroads.

Either join Boruto on his embarrassing impression of a defection from Konoha, or drag him back to the Hokage by the neck. Kicking and screaming all the way.

Of course, Shikadai decides to follow Boruto on his inevitable trip to death.

And he's bending over backwards to please Boruto, _again_ , because he cares. ( _and he actually gives a crap about the blue-haired snake, too_ ). And because it feels right.

But then Shikadai's frustrated because why couldn't Boruto sacrifice what he wanted this time? Why couldn't he be the one to turn around?

Shikadai wants to know.

So, he asks.

He asks as he and Boruto walk in front of everyone, shoulder to shoulder.

He asks, "Why couldn't you just come home?"

And Boruto is ignorant to the point it drives you mad. "Because I knew you'd come with me."

And _oh_ , the _audacity_ -

Shikadai tries again. "Why can't you ever follow me? For once, Boruto?"

They stop to look each other in the eyes. The others sit down away from them.

They claim they need a break anyway.

"Where is this even coming from, Shikadai? Pent up feelings much?"

And Shikadai knows he should laugh it off and keep walking. Tell Boruto to forget he ever said anything.

But he can't.

He doesn't want to.

"Be serious, Boruto!"

And now Boruto is actually comprehending.

"Honestly, I-I don't even know what exactly I'm mad about. If it's me always giving for you, or you loving Mitsuki so much, or me just being tired of always getting the backside of your friendship."

Boruto is silent.

"But I don't like the way it is," Shikadai shoves his hands in his pockets, "I don't like how I'm the one you don't mind forgetting to hang out with, the one you're okay with cheating in a fight with-"

Boruto blazes. "You said we were cool about that!"

"And we are!"Shikadai snarls. "But that doesn't mean it was okay!"

"Isn't that what the definition of forgiveness is?"

"The fact I have to be the one to forgive you before you even say sorry says something about that."

Boruto huffs out a laugh in disbelief. "Well I'm sorry, but I'm not responsible for your passive-aggressiveness."

" _Woah_ , don't get mad at me because you don't know how to recognize someone's feelings. Your so worried about getting the Hokage's attention and your father neglecting you, you don't even understand what it's like to care about anyone other than yourself."

Boruto's face scrunches, his arm stretches out towards the ever-stretching road. "And who do you think I'm chasing after?!"

Shikadai wants to scream. "You're not even doing it for him! Don't even _pretend_ that's why! You're doing it because _you_ , Boruto, _you_ want him back."

"I care about other people, Shikadai."

"Yeah? Well, apparently that excludes me."

The others pretend they're not eavesdropping.

Shikadai hates it.

Boruto crosses his arms. "Well, I'm sorry, _babe_. I didn't realize we were in a relationship. It didn't look like I was gonna have to care to your every need and try not to hurt your delicate feelings."

"And there it is!"

"What?!"

"Your incapability to address the situation when someone calls you out!'

Boruto scoffs. "Your tripping out, man."

"No, because I'm the only one that puts up with it. I'm the only one you dare to do it to-and doesn't go. But you don't seem to see that; because here we are chasing after your supposed best friend that _left_!"

"Well, what do you want from me?!"

Shikadai gives a sarcastic shrug of the shoulders. "Well, I don't know? An ' _I'm sorry'_? Maybe an ' _I'll acknowledge you now'_?

Boruto rolls his eyes.

"Sorry, Shikadai."

Shikadai places a hand the back of his neck and groans. "Thanks, man. Really. I'm so glad you care so much, you proved it with that heartfelt apology. You care _so_ much, dude."

Boruto's blue eyes are piercing. "Are you done?"

 _Can we go now?_

Shikadai shakes his head. He doesn't care anymore. "Yeah. Whatever."

Shikadai stays in the back for the rest of the walk.

* * *

"I'm sorry."

He says this later.

Shikadai has already forgiven him.

 _Shikadai wasn't a cloud watcher like his father, he liked to watch the stars more._

Boruto sits down beside him.

"I just- you're always the one that tells me when I'm wrong. You always ride on the train with me and lecture me when I piss off my dad. Or if I set a bad example for Himawari. You know what it feels like to see your mom look lonely when your dad works late-You're always there. I just thought that- that you knew I cared. I'd chase after you, too."

Shikadai doesn't look at him.

"You sure about that?"

"Yeah."

He's silent for a few moments.

"I'm sorry, too."

Boruto turns to look at him. "Huh?"

Shikadai doesn't look back.

"I-what I said was pent up. I'm the one that chooses to follow you; it's just sometimes I get tired of it. But I do it anyway; that's how we work together."

"Our dynamic, right?"

"Yeah."

Shikadai finally faces the blonde-haired boy.

"I was jealous, Boruto. And it wasn't right. So, I'm sorry."

Boruto doesn't respond.

"Sometimes, I stress," Boruto admits.

Shikadai raises an eyebrow. "Why?"

"We're all gonna grow up. We're all gonna get scars, become different people, and look death in the eyes."

Shikadai hums. Because it's true.

"I'm just afraid you won't be on that train with me anymore. You won't be there for me anymore."

Shikadai coughed back a laugh. "You're afraid I'm gonna die?"

Boruto shakes his head. "I'm afraid you'll get too tired."

Shikadai ponders how to answer this.

He decides on, "I can't really promise anything."

Boruto deflates a little.

Shikadai has never been one to lie or sugar-coat.

He continues," But all I can say is I'll always be there. I may not be able to handle you twenty-four-seven, but maybe we can take the bus instead of the train."

Boruto snorts.

Shikadai nudges Boruto's shoulder. "And who knows? Maybe you'll be less of a pain by the time we're sixteen…"

He says it hopefully.

Boruto laughs wholeheartedly. " _Yeah right_!"

Shikadai joins him.

* * *

 _They pretend they're riding on top of the train, hair blowing in the wind, laughing about something stupid._

* * *

 **Hey.**

 **This is a just a little somethin', somethin' to write and post.**

 **I've always loved Naruto and Shikamaru's relation ship so much, and from the first time I read Boruto (and watched), I felt the relationship bloomed into the two sons, the same but entirely different. And it's just a little more unstable, because it's built off of something so much weaker, but the bond is just as awesome.**

 _(I was so stressed about Fidelity I just had to write another Boruto fanfiction that I don't care so much about)_

 _(got me in my feelings)_

 **Anyway, hope you enjoyed, love feedback, good and bad so write a little somethin' would you?**

 **Thanks for reading, boo.**

 **Love, R.A.**


End file.
